Smile, You're Doing Fine

[intro]
One, two, three — quit!

[verse 1]
Yellow shirt, name tag, minimum wage
Nine on the clock, I was already caged
Mopping up slushie by the register line
Manager Dave says "smile, you're doing fine"

[chorus]
This is the worst job I ever had
Grease on my hands and my weekends gone bad
I'm screaming in the walk-in freezer, singing to the frost
Six bucks an hour — man, that job cost

[verse 2]
Employee discount, three percent off
Unloading the truck while Dave plays golf
Someone left a milkshake on shelf number four
Found it in August, behind the door

[chorus]
This is the worst job I ever had
Grease on my hands and my weekends gone bad
I'm screaming in the walk-in freezer, singing to the frost
Six bucks an hour — man, that job cost

[bridge]
Dave got a jet ski
Dave got a boat
Dave got my weekend
And a keg for the store
I got a bus pass
And a cold that won't quit
Fifteen-minute break — I'm splitting it!

[chorus]
This is the worst job I ever had
Grease on my hands and my weekends gone bad
Screaming in the walk-in freezer till the frost became my crew
Six bucks an hour — but I made it through

[outro]
Last Friday shift, I dropped the mop
Walked past Dave, and I never stopped
Worst job I ever had — thanks, Dave
Never coming back, Dave, never coming back